An Expat's Life: How To Make Friends

Childhood friend

When I moved to Seattle in 1999, having only ever lived in the house where I was born and raised in West Valley City, Utah (represent!), I had a hard time making friends. It was the first time I realized both how important friends are as well as the fact that I had no idea how one goes about making them.

Being born and raised in one place, I'd never grappled with the need to make friends because it had always just happened (plus, with no internet, my options were fairly limited). As a kid it's easy and, as you grow, when you don't have to start from scratch, you never really recognize when you're making friends. One day you just have a new person to call or hangout with. But, when you don't know anyone, and everything is new, making friends becomes a deliberate activity.

Seattle friends

In Seattle, making friends was hard. Without any experience, Mike & I faltered and failed more than once. Eventually, however, we wound up with an amazing group of friends. It took about two years before we had any real friends though, and we met those almost exclusively through our various jobs.

In 2010, when we moved to Dundee, we encountered the same conundrum. We went back to our notes from our early days in Seattle, hoping to duplicate our successes and minimize our failures, desperate for immediate results as we didn't have 11 years to cultivate friendships, as we had in Seattle. We were on an accelerated timeline and wanted friends NOW! And, looking back, we were fairly successful. We still have friends from our early days in Dundee, both from my various jobs as well as Mike's school. But, we weren't really successful until we moved to London in 2012.

London friends

In London we discovered the magic of the Yelp community and, with it, our first expat community. Since Yelp was still in its early days in London, most in the community were expats and expats, as we found, are instant friends. Additionally, I wound up working at a stellar organization with topnotch colleagues and became fast friends with most of them too. Within weeks of arriving in London we had an amazing group of friends, both locals and expats.

In New York City we attempted all the tricks we'd picked up in London and prior. Unfortunately, like we've been saying, New York City was hard and what worked for us previously wasn't really working for us there. But, since we maintained our expat skills, and expats are usually open to new experiences, I persevered and eventually discovered the HarlemGo Meetup Group.

NYC friends

Meetup is very popular in New York City and HarlemGo, though not providing us with any long-term friends, provided us with some much needed socialization. Eventually, we also wound up crafting a really good group of friends through our jobs.

When we moved to Taiwan last year we were immediately greeted by a large group of expats, instant friends, because Mike's new colleagues, native English speaking teachers, are all expats. But, we're also keen to make friends with some locals, though our inability to speak the local language is proving a difficult obstacle. Still, as expats we persevere.

Kaohsiung friends

Earlier this month, while revisiting some of our old tricks, I came across Conversation Kaohsiung, a Meetup group of mostly locals wanting to practice their language skills. This group has already proven quite fruitful as we've already gone to multiple events with them or those we've met through them. It's a very promising start.

Additionally, last week Yelp announced their expansion into Taiwan and, though the community is in its infancy, I'm optimistic that it might be able to play a similar role for us here as it did in London. We're also set to begin Chinese lessons in April, which will hopefully help us overcome that pesky language issue.

Our time in Taiwan has already been exceptional and these new developments will hopefully only add to our experience here, no doubt making it that much harder to leave when the time comes. But, if and when we do leave, making friends is no longer the obstacle it once was because of the lessons we've learned from the trials and tribulations we've faced in the past. By being open to new experiences and not afraid of trying new things, we're meeting new people from all around the world and getting to call them friends. Our friends enrich our lives exponentially. We only hope they're getting something out of it too.

Missing Europe and What Could Have Been

Mike enjoying the fruits of his labor
(yes, that is a bride at a bar mitzvah)

Mike has been working some crazy hours.  We think this is what happens when one becomes an adult.  We don't like it but we're accepting it, for now at least.  Since Mike started his job in mid-April, he's been working six days a week and at least 12 hours each day.  Crazy, right?  Happily, this past weekend was the last event he has on until September and yesterday we received word that the end of these crazy work hours just might be nigh.  More importantly, we're looking at the possibility of actually getting some paid time off over the July 4th holiday.  I was initially very excited upon hearing this news because I love to plan our holidays but, after just a few hours, my excitement has turned into a whole bunch of other feelings.

I'm not sure if I've discussed the utter devastation we experienced last year when the UK eliminated our visa scheme, essentially destroying our 20 year plan.  Perhaps due to the mind switching into survival mode, and all our efforts being focused on our forced return to the US, I may not have mentioned our heartbreak, or at least not harped on about it.  But, now that we've come out the other end and staunched the downward spiral, I would like to state, for the record, how utterly devastated I am that we gave up everything for only a two and a half year experience.  I could've accepted the absolute loss for a 20 year adventure but for just two and a half years?  Perhaps time will change my mind but right now I'm not fully convinced it wasn't an absolute failure.

To be honest, Dundee was horrid.  Even with my sweet government job, we were still two people living on one person's very low salary in a horrible small town surrounded by scary hillbillies.  We lived in almost complete isolation during this time and, with the bulk of our two and a half years abroad spent there, this may explain my feelings of resentment, remorse, and anger.

Once we got down to London our fortunes changed immensely and, had we not had to save every penny for our imminent transatlantic move, we would've been living quite comfortably.  We had an apartment we liked, great friends, and jobs we both loved.  We were able to experience what could have been for about 6 months, and it was very nearly perfect and exactly what we had hoped it would be.  Losing that reality is no doubt the source of my sadness.

The Plan had us living in London for two years where we would've, with no doubt in our minds, been very successful.  If The Plan had been allowed to continue I would've accepted every sacrifice as having been worthy but that's not what happened and today we find ourselves worse off than we were as newlyweds, back in 1999.  I can't help but compare where we were to where we are.  Living abroad is different; because we had never been there before we had no basis for comparison.  But, starting over in an American city; we've been here before.

As I begin to plan our first real holiday since returning to the US I can't help but recall our recent past and how it could have all been very different.  If we'd gotten to stay in the UK, I'd be comparing Portugal to Croatia or Finland to Austria.  Instead I'm comparing Boston to Providence and Maine to Vermont.  There was a time when our current situation - living in New York, comparing east coast cities for upcoming holidays - would've been acceptable and exciting but after everything we've been through I can't help but feel like a giant failure.

Next Chapter, Please

As we begin to bid Dundee adieu, I'm trying to frame how I'll come to remember our time here.  Throughout these two years I've been rather depressed and disappointed by the whole experience and, while beneficial for Mike, these years have been rather detrimental for me.  Although I'm thrilled to be ending this chapter, I carry a fear that these years will come back to haunt me.  For example, I will not be surprised when the doctor tells me that the reason for my fatal illness is due to the short time I lived in Dundee.

When we first arrived in Dundee, we were very happy with our new surroundings.  It would take a couple of months for the excitement to wear off and the reality of our situation to emerge.  It became evident by mid-October 2010 that Dundee was a small, depressed town with a severe binge-drinking problem and a rather high level of drink crime (e.g. vandalism, mostly in the form of broken shop windows).  Employment options were limited and the realisation that we were going to be unable to continue to meet our financial obligations back in the States proved very stressful.  These first months would prove to be our hardest.

Things began to get brighter once we got down to London, in May 2011.  I regained a bit of my confidence, Mike was able to find employment in his field, and we began enjoying the UK a bit more.  Upon returning to Dundee, in September 2011, we had a wholly different perspective and were ready to give it another chance.  I know now that any attempts to paint Dundee in a positive light were just our attempts to mentally prepare for another two years here.  However, as soon as Mike made the decision to graduate early, all attempts to shine this turd stopped and the reality that this bad situation would be ending shortly has made these few remaining months almost as difficult as the first few.

I know that I will remember our time in Dundee differently than how I've represented it here.  If I don't purge these years from my mind completely, I may actually remember parts of it rather fondly.  In the short term I will only remember the bad but my long term memory will probably be quite kind, if for no other reason than the amount of travel I've been able to achieve while stationed in this purgatory.

Although we've been here since August 2010, we've actually only lived in Dundee for 15 of these 22 months.  Moving here has provided us with the opportunity to move to Paris, Mallorca, and Rome for a month each and to London for four.  Additionally, we've been to Sweden, Germany, The Netherlands, and Belgium, all within these 22 months, not to mention extensive travels within Britain itself.  If this time has benefited me at all it is due to these travel experiences.

As we approach our final days in Dundee, and try to contain our glee whilst surrounded by people who are choosing to remain here, we are willing to acknowledge that this experience, when taken in context, has probably been a net positive one.  Besides the possibility of these years being the cause of whatever kills me, this time can be viewed positively in the immediate aftermath because it is now over and we can move forward. In the larger context, Mike now has a BA Fine Arts from an esteemed institution and the confidence to practice as an artist.

Though the remainder of our thirties will be spent paying off this debt (and that incurred during our twenties) and establishing new careers, at least we've accomplished what we set out to do (and enjoyed at least 30% of the experience).

Is This Summer?

We have been enjoying summer-like weather for a week now.  It's rare to have a solid week of lovely weather and all of Britain is making the most of this phenomenon.

Yesterday Mike & I walked along the Tay for 5 miles, to the beach in Broughty Ferry.  We haven't returned since our first visit, back in August 2010, mostly because there hasn't been a nice enough day to entice us.  Luckily, we've now had the good fortune to see the Dundonians at play and it made for some interesting people watching.

We spent hours watching the Dundonians on the beach and, before yesterday, I'd never seen anyone walking on a beach whilst wearing socks. Shoes and socks, sure.  Just shoes, okay.  But, socks no shoes?  Like sleeveless t-shirts tucked into denim short shorts, that's apparently the style in these parts.  Similarly, I'd never seen a stroller on the beach before yesterday.  I'm not sure what others do with their kids; I've never really paid any attention before.  All I know is that seeing a whole lot of strollers being pushed on the sand appeared bizarre to me.

After enjoying the people watching at the beach we headed back home where we realised we had actually become sunburned.  Are we in Mallorca?

Today, although burned and tired from our 10-mile walk yesterday, we still wanted to enjoy the lovely day so we headed back down to the Tay where we saw sunbathing sea lions (or seals, I don't know the difference).  We sat on the river wall for a bit, enjoying their company, before heading back home.

Knowing this fine weather won't last, we're trying to make the most of it and appreciate it while it's here.  At the same time, we wouldn't mind living where this kind of weather is known as summer rather than a phenomenon.

Council Tax

I got my council tax bill yesterday; £800 for the year (including student discount).  Council tax is one of these cultural differences that I'm having a really hard time with.  For those uninitiated, council tax is a local government charge on all domestic properties. In my head, I've equated council tax with property tax in the States; "it helps to fund local services such as schools, libraries, and refuse collection".  But, the issue I'm having a hard time accepting/understanding is the fact that, as a renter, I'm responsible for any tax at all that is associated with the property.

According to a friend (who owns her flat), everyone pays council tax.  Rather than it being strictly the responsibility of the property owner, renters pay the council tax associated with the flat they're occupying whilst the property owner pays the council tax for wherever they might be living (if in the UK).  If the property is unoccupied, the cost reverts to the property owner but at a 50% discount.  Other discounts can apply, including for single occupants and students.

The mental hurdle I'm encountering is the fact that I'm a renter and, as such, I believe I shouldn't have to pay taxes for a property I don't own.  If I was renting in Seattle, the city would bill me for my personal garbage collection and utilities (including sewage, electricity, and water) but I would not have to pay any tax associated with the property I was occupying or for city maintenance (one of the perks of renting).

An equally maddening issue is what this city does with these funds.  Some of the more egregious offences, as I see them, are as follows:

1. The city owns the waste management services; rather than contracting to a private company, the city owns the trucks and machinery and all waste management staff are city employees. 
2. There is a 'leisure centre' with a swimming pool and water slides (the Brits love their water parks) though the University of Dundee is less than a mile away with a pool of its own (though no slides).  Why are there two pools within a mile of each other, both of which I have to pay to use (if I wanted to, which I don't), and at least one of which I'm paying for with my council taxes?
3. I've just visited the Leisure website for Dundee and am even further offended by Dundee Ice Arena, Indoor Sports Centres, and Lochee Swim Centre (another one?).  Why are my tax dollars paying for an ice arena or indoor sports centre (or additional pool)?

Perhaps if I had purchased property in Dundee these expenses would be reasonable; as a property owner, I would want to invest in my neighbourhood to assist the appreciation of my personal property.  But, as both a renter and a foreigner, I'm having a hard time coming to terms with this concept of forcing the transient populations to invest in a city of which they have no vested interest.  Am I wrong?

As an aside, I had wondered if perhaps this method of collecting taxes was an incentive to purchase property (if the owner isn't responsible for the taxes, perhaps it becomes more financially feasible for some to purchase income properties) but, after speaking with my friend, she doesn't believe that's the case.  In fact, there doesn't appear to be any incentive for home ownership here (i.e. no tax breaks).  Apparently, the only incentive for home ownership is the investment, or perceived investment.  My friend answered, "if you're renting, you're throwing your money away".  Of course, the same argument can be said for home ownership, especially in this housing climate and especially if you don't get an annual tax break.

Back In The Game

After our miserable attempt at a day out a few weeks ago, we would have been perfectly content to watch these next four months pass us by from the semi-comfort of our couch.  Fortunately, though, we were forced to get back in the game yesterday when we were invited to a birthday party in Edinburgh.

Since it costs about £30 for two return bus tickets, we decided to make a day of it.  We planned a leisurely day of galleries and charity shops in Stockbridge, a neighbourhood in New Town (versus Old Town) which we have not yet explored.  New Town, having been built in the Georgian era, has not been as appealing to us as the medieval Old Town and, consequently, we have mostly ignored it on our previous visits.  This time though, with planned itinerary and map in hand, we ventured forth.

Upon arrival, we made a quick, unplanned stop at the newly reopened National Portrait Gallery to see Graham Fagen's (one of Mike's tutors) exhibition of commissioned work.  Afterwards, we wandered north, stopping at a few galleries along the way, until reaching Raeburn Place (aka charity shop heaven) where we had a lot of fun zigzagging from shop to shop.  After spending a couple hours working up an appetite, we enjoyed a late lunch at The Stockbridge Tap (pictured) before leaving to explore further afield.

After our meal we grabbed a bus out of town to the new Decathlon, a store we discovered whilst in London and one that is almost as fun as our favourite store back in Seattle, REI.  We used to go to the REI on Yale just for fun, whenever we were bored (usually on Sundays).  Sometimes we'd find an amazing deal but usually we'd just have fun picking through all their cool outdoor supplies (good times!).  While Decathlon proved diverting and worth the effort it was not quite as fun as our REI days used to be.  However, it will be fun having one just a short tube ride away when we relocate to London later this year.

We had a couple more hours to kill before we had to catch the bus to our party and, happily, Decathlon was in a business park surrounded by other diversions.  We felt like we were back in the States, shopping for our house.  We were surrounded by a B&Q (Home Depot equivalent), Curry's (like Best Buy), and Tesco (somewhat reminiscent of Super Target).  I almost expected, when we were leaving B&Q, to find ourselves back in Columbia City.  Alas, we were still in the 'burbs of Edinburgh and now running late for our party.

Although I say I have no desire to ever return to Scotland again, I would not be averse to returning to Edinburgh if the opportunity arose.  Edinburgh is a beautiful city and one I highly recommend.  It is unique and magical and one I would've enjoyed living in.

Epic Fail

We spent this past weekend in Inverness thanks to our Sainsbury's vouchers.  On Saturday morning, we grabbed the 9AM train and were in Inverness by noon.  Upon arrival, we immediately dropped our bags off at our hostel, where we'd be spending Saturday night, and began exploring the area.  Inverness is super cute and, like everywhere else in Scotland that we've visited, we liked it tons more than our own town.  Dundee is a shit hole.

Ness Islands trail

We decided, because of our late start, we would stick around Inverness for the day and explore Loch Ness on Sunday.  We headed west along the River Ness to explore the Ness Islands (lovely), with the intention of walking the first part of the Great Glen Way, a 117km walking trail from Inverness to Fort William.  Unfortunately, due to our late start and stopping for a meal, we didn't quite make it as far as we'd hoped before we had to turn back.

The part of the walk we experienced wasn't terribly exciting though.  There were no amazing views or great scenery.  Apparently, 'the capital of the Highlands' is a misnomer because Inverness isn't in the Highlands.  It's pretty though but that really isn't a replacement for what we had expected.

Great Glen Way

Our first night was spent uneventfully and we awoke on Sunday morning psyched for our day at Loch Ness.  Though we had originally hoped to get to Foyers on the east coast, for their legendary falls, no buses run to Foyers on the weekend, at least not during low season, so we were heading to the west coast of Loch Ness, to Urquhart Castle, as our Plan B.  Unfortunately, when we got to the bus station to buy our tickets, we were told the schedule we were using to plan our whole day was out of date and that there were actually no public buses running to Urquhart Castle, or anywhere along Loch Ness.  There was, however, a private tour company operating an all day tour for £27 per person that we could purchase.  We were screwed.

River Ness

Inverness is cute when just passing through but trying to kill a whole weekend in that small town proved difficult.  Saturday had been fun because we didn't expect to spend any additional time there.  Stranded for another whole day, Inverness quickly loses its charm.  Any shops or restaurants that were going to open on Sunday (not many) weren't opening until noon, leaving us with a few hours to kill before we could get a drink or go shopping.  We were bored out of our minds and it wasn't even 11AM.

We rallied as best we could and decided to take the scenic train route, via Aberdeen, home.  We jumped on the 3:30pm train and were enjoying ourselves until Elgin when we lost our seats to an old man claiming to be disabled (we were sitting in the priority seats).  The train was full and we wound up in the doors for 1.5 hours, without much of a view or comfortable seats.  By the time we were back in normal seats it was dark and the 'scenic' part of our train ride had passed.

I'd been having a pretty tough week, even before this weekend's epic fail, so I was absolutely broken by the time we got home, around 7pm Sunday night.  The whole purpose of spending a weekend in Inverness was to explore Loch Ness and we left without having even seen it, or much else.

Look Out Nessie

Mike & I had a fun day today.  Rather than just walking to our local grocery store, like always, we decided to walk 4 miles east to the closest Sainsbury's.  We haven't shopped at a Sainsbury's since London and it was a lot of fun seeing the familiar packaging of the Sainsbury's brand, reminding us of our time there this past summer.

The reason for our grocery shopping detour was due to the ScotRail vouchers Sainsbury's was giving away.  For every purchase over £15 you received a voucher to travel anywhere in Scotland for only £19 return.  Mike & I were just saying how sad it was that we've been in Scotland now for over a year and we have yet to make our way up to Loch Ness.  But, when we researched prices, train tickets were running about £35 each, and we just don't have £70 worth of excitement in us about Scotland any more.  But, now that we have these vouchers, we can definitely muster up £38 worth of excitement.

Train travel in the UK is expensive.  Actually, all travel in the UK is expensive.  It's cheaper to purchase a flight to somewhere on the continent than it is to go to Edinburgh (sadly, though, we have to go to Edinburgh in order to fly to the continent).  Accommodations here aren't cheap, either.  We booked a hostel in Inverness for one night and it cost £36.  Inverness, people.  That's more than we paid for a hostel in Edinburgh.  There's no reason for a hostel in Inverness, in February, to charge those prices.

All that aside, now that we have cheap travel to a whole new area of Scotland, to a place we've always wanted to see, we're excited again about exploring Scotland.  Inverness is the capital of the Highlands, situated on the River Ness, near Loch Ness, and we get to spend a weekend there thanks to our Sainsbury's vouchers.

Besides the voucher situation, though, we had a whole lot of fun today just on our weekly grocery shopping trip.  We're simple people with simple pleasures who enjoy walking 4 miles one way to go grocery shopping.  Receiving a voucher for cheap travel was just the gravy.

November

Not much to report for the month of November.  Stateside, our Seattle house should close early next week.  We had to short sell, which wasn't ideal but, with our reduced circumstances, necessary.  Although we'll miss our first house, we're actually thrilled to be rid of it.  We're still going through a period of shedding adult responsibilities and living simply with the goal of no monthly payments and no financial responsibilities.  Of course, we still have council tax, rent, mobiles, and internet, and probably always will, but nothing we can't just walk away from.  We have a bit more Stateside debt to shed before we're where we want to be but soon we'll begin to resemble the financially carefree souls we were in our youth (but, hopefully, a bit wiser).

On this side of the pond, November proved to be relatively quiet.  We didn't do anything for bonfire night (Guy Fawkes Night, 5 Nov) nor the Christmas lighting celebration in the city centre this past Friday.  We did, however, venture out for the NEoN Digital Arts Festival where we enjoyed a PechaKucha night and I got to volunteer as a photographer at the debating event.  We also headed out to explore Blair Atholl and Glen Tilt for our November ramble.

As we were reminded recently, last week was Thanksgiving back in the States.  We haven't started celebrating American holidays over here yet and, consequently, it almost completely went unnoticed.  Celebrating American holidays abroad is perhaps something people do when they have children or a larger ex-pat community or perhaps if they're longing for 'home' but, since we're none of the above, we haven't yet felt the need to export any of those celebrations or traditions.  Besides, Thanksgiving is kind of a bullshit holiday.

Forgetting the bullshit origin stories about the harvest or pilgrims and indians and just looking at what Thanksgiving has become, I get that it provides a chance to give thanks and blah blah blah but doesn't the existence of a day to give thanks allow for the option to not give thanks the rest of the year?  Shouldn't one always be giving thanks?  Like the signs I see on public transportation labelling a few seats as priority for the disabled or pregnant; shouldn't all seats be priority seats?  Shouldn't everyone be empowered to offer their seat to anyone who might need it?  The existence of those signs seemingly absolves those sitting elsewhere of the moral obligation to offer their seat when necessary.  I reject the idea that being nice requires a sign or a holiday.  Just be nice.

If you did celebrate Thanksgiving, however, we hope you had a happy one.  And, if you didn't, we hope you enjoyed your Thursday.

October

Whitelees Windfarm

October has seemingly flown by.  We started it off with a trip to Glasgow and ended it with the same.  We're spending a lot of time in Glasgow.  Desi has been finding herself there on business for a day every other week or so and this past week she got to stay for the whole week, staying in a fancy, modern hotel on the company dime just like old times (ish).

As part of her new hire induction programme she spent the latter part of this past week visiting existing economic development projects, including Whitelees Windfarm and Loch Lomond Shores, and some tourist sites, like Dean Castle and Country Park.  Mike joined her in Glasgow on Thursday night, spending Friday on his own visiting galleries and museums until Desi was able to join him.

Loch Lomond

In between trips to Glasgow, we spent October exploring other areas of Scotland still new to us; we rambled the Knock of Crieff and explored the Pitlochry area.  We've gotten a bit carried away with our rambles though and will be cutting them back to just once a month, as we did last year, but both towns were a lot of fun and very pretty and we're looking forward to our next ramble, in mid-November.

Black Spout, outside Pitlochry

Dundee is currently host to both a Literary Festival and Science Festival and next week we have a Digital Arts Festival to look forward to.  In fact, including the Oktoberfest celebrations from earlier this month, we've been kept very busy this month with all these festivals and we're having a great time.  We're going out with friends, participating in cultural events, seeing the country, and enjoying ourselves immensely.  October has been a great month!

Back On A Budget

During the heady days of summer - with the heat (ish), sun (ish), and double income (ish) - we quickly fell back into our old groove of doing what we wanted when we wanted.  But, now that we're back in Dundee and Mike's a full-time student again, our depleting savings account is reminding us that we're a single income family again and we've got to stick to a super tight budget.  Happily, I love budgets!  Seriously, I think they're fun.  I get the Excel spreadsheet out, start making lists, we have in-depth financial conversations; really, it's fun!

The Venice trip is off.  Not really only due to finances but because no one in Mike's class was going even though it was supposed to be a class trip.  Apparently, the school was super lazy about the prep work and waited until mid-September to even mention it.  They haven't said anything else about logistics, lodging, etc. and the trip is supposed to take place mid-October.  Therefore, we're out.  We'll eventually get to Venice, we have no doubt, so there is no mourning the cancellation of this trip.  It would've been fun to do it with his class but, whatever; it'll be fun when we eventually get there, with or without his class.

We're still on for another big Christmas slash New Year's holiday during Mike's winter break.  We've already reserved our flat, just down the street from - and with a view of - the Colosseum in Rome.  We're now just waiting to purchase our plane tickets, which will probably happen in October.

We won't have a spring break this year due to Mike's workload, which was planned so we're not heartbroken.  Plus, no spring break makes it easier for us to head to Baltimore in June for a friend's wedding, which we couldn't be more excited for.  Otherwise, we're staying in Dundee this summer.  Mike will pick up some studio time and hopefully get some more experience for his CV while I try to keep my awesome job with the Scottish government.

Our financial priorities are still the same as they have been: Mike's education and travel, and by sticking to our super tight budget we can accomplish both.

Dundee, Maybe You're Not A Dick

outside Edinburgh from the train

We returned to Dundee on a lovely Friday afternoon in early September.  We had left a sad, angry, depressed town just 4 months earlier and had expected to find it as such upon our return.  Instead, we found ourselves returning to a happy, shiny, friendly place with (mostly) happy, friendly locals and shiny new buildings (or buildings mid-shine).  Apparently, the new Victoria & Albert museum is the cause of all this positive activity (though ground doesn't break until 2012, opening in late 2014).  But, regardless of the cause, we've returned to a whole new city and we're loving it!

view from our bedroom

Our flat is TONS better than Tay Mills, our student housing from last year.  It's better than our London flat, too.  It's large and comfortable, provides instant access to the outdoors (Tay Mills was a huge apartment block, taking at least 10 minutes to get from our flat to the outdoors), and is in a much better location.

The best part of our move (for me, at least) is that I've now got an amazing job working for the economic development arm of the Scottish government.  All my friends from my London gig helped open some Dundee doors for me, getting me interviews that I have thus far been unable to get on my own, and I'm extremely grateful to them.  I love my new job!

Since our return, we've completely changed our original opinion of Dundee.  It's still no Edinburgh or Glasgow but it's not too shabby either and, now that we've got a super comfy couch, we're inviting all our friends to come check it out for yourselves.

One Year Later

on the train to Dundee, 12 Aug 2010

Later this week we’ll be celebrating the one year anniversary of our arrival in the United Kingdom, having arrived in Dundee, Scotland on 12 Aug 2010. It was one year ago this week when we were living with our friends on Queen Anne, overwhelmed with excitement, ready to embark on this new adventure. It was one year ago this week when we were also experiencing degrees of sadness about making such a drastic life change, leaving everything familiar behind. One year later and, though our excitement has dulled a bit, as has the sadness, we’re moving forward with every confidence that we made the right decision.

Mike has adapted to being a student with greater ease than either of us had expected and is looking forward to his future career as an artist or, at the very least, in the art field.  Duncan of Jordanstone was the perfect programme for him, allowing him the freedom to be creative and to pursue his specific interests (right now, subconscious drawing) and is fully supportive of his artistic growth.  Mike is really looking forward to returning to his studies next month and we're both really looking forward to his first university field trip in October, when his class will travel to Venice for a week to attend La Biennale (and I get to join him).

After a rough start, I’m now doing much better but I'm still struggling a bit with this transition; there are both good days and bad but the bad days are occurring less often nowadays.  I’m optimistic about returning to Dundee, too.  We’ve almost secured a flat (just waiting for confirmation) and, based on pictures and location, it’s sure to be better than what we had there before.  Additionally, my job prospects have improved after my summer in London temping with the Scottish government.  I’ve made some great connections down here with people who know Dundee and who’ve already proved exceptionally helpful by making introductions and pursuing leads on my behalf.

Within a year, in addition to parts of England and Scotland, we’ve seen Paris and parts of Mallorca and have been to Sweden.  Plus, to celebrate one year in the UK, we’re off to Baden Baden, Germany this weekend for our second, and final, mini-break of the summer. 

London, summer 2011

We’re proud of what we’ve accomplished this year and there is no doubt in our minds that we made the right decision, both for immediate adventure as well as long-term foundation building.  Looking back, although a year in Puerto Rico would’ve been amazing, we’re glad Mike was accepted at Duncan of Jordanstone.  Looking ahead, our future is much brighter than it used to be.  

Looking Back And Moving On

Today is our last day in Dundee until September.  We embark tomorrow morning on another adventure, this time to London.  To prepare for this new adventure we're reviewing these last 8.5 months, hoping to remind ourselves of what went well and what could've gone better.  This exercise, along with other lessons, will hopefully help to make this move easier than the last.

Dundee is a picturesque town.  It's situated right on the Tay, the city centre is super cute, and the weather has been better than expected, especially this last week.  But, even with all these positives, we may have set our original expectations a bit too high prior to our arrival in August 2010.  We expected a larger city, a live music scene, a college town vibrant with youth and idealism.  We were disappointed.

To avoid this type of mistake in the future we're trying to keep expectations for future adventures low.  We're hoping for the best but expecting the worst, the latter of which we neglected when relocating last year.  We were so convinced that our new home would be amazing that we didn't even consider what would happen if it wasn't.  The reality was nearly devastating but, happily, we've nearly overcome it.  Now, although we're smarter about both mental preparation as well as recovery, avoiding that type of surprise in the future is our goal.

The number one priority upon our arrival in London is finding employment.  The second priority continues to be travel.  Looking back, we're very happy with our travel experiences since arriving in the UK.  We haven't travelled as much as originally planned but we have done the big trips we had hoped for (winter break and spring break).  This summer we hope to continue to take advantage of proximity, especially since London has more airports and easier access to the continent than Dundee making weekend trips possible.  We're especially looking forward to our summer rambles and exploring the areas surrounding London.

One thing that has gone better than expected is Mike's education.  Mike is getting a great education here (Duncan of Jordanstone is one of the best art schools in the UK) and he's loving every minute of it.  Plus, because he was a 2nd year direct entrant, he'll be graduating a year earlier than expected.  Yes, this is one area of the past 9 months that has gone exceedingly well.

Overall, we're pretty happy with the direction we've taken.  It's a complete and drastic change from our previous existence and we're still living abroad amateurs but every day we're learning something new and we believe these lessons have been worth the sacrifices.

Spring Ramble

Dundee in the distance

We decided to stay close to home for our March ramble.  We've been wanting to walk across the Tay Road Bridge since August, which is just down from Dundee's city centre area.  Today we made the journey.

The bridge is 1.4 miles long and has a dedicated pedestrian/bike path down its centre.  On the south side of the Tay is a cute little car park with a 'kiosk' where we purchased supplies for an impromptu picnic on the green before heading back towards Dundee.

Newport on Tay

Our walk only took about 3 hours and was super low effort.  We had been concerned about possible wind and cold in the middle of the Tay but the weather wound up being lovely throughout our walk.  There was really no traffic noise or debris from the passing cars, either.  The pedestrian path, besides being a bit narrow, is actually very well suited for a leisurely stroll.

In Like A Lion

Wild flowers

We experienced some lovely spring weather this past week, with warm and sunny days and wild flowers beginning to bloom.  Hoping this meant winter was finally behind us we were looking forward to this weekend for our March ramble, our first spring ramble in Scotland.  Unfortunately, the weather turned on Friday and we've had snow mixed with rain ever since.

Although the temperatures have stayed above freezing, so there is no accumulation on the ground, we are nonetheless deterred from rambling this weekend.  After the lovely weather we experienced on our February ramble, we have no interest in returning to January ramble temperatures two months later.  There should be some progression.

A lovely spring-like morning

Thus, rather than a traditional ramble yesterday, we found ourselves wandering about the city centre.  Mike wanted to try paella so we headed out into the elements for some ingredients.  What we thought was going to be a quick trip turned into a lovely afternoon of window shopping and city rambling.

Desi, as yet unimpressed by the High Street stores, actually found a couple clothing stores she might like to return to, New Look and a cute boutique in the Wellgate unfortunately called Zion: A Star Is Born.  We also stopped into Currys for a quick look at future electronics purchases, we need a new external hard drive and are still looking for a better way to digitally store and play our music, and wound up having a great conversation about new technology with a salesman there.  Upon returning home, Mike made an amazing paella dinner, which we will definitely be adding into our rotation.

Although spring's not quite here, if this week's spring weather teaser was any indication, we expect it will be our favourite season in Scotland and we look forward to the opportunity to ramble in its loveliness.  Until then, Mike's paella and window shopping appears to be a pleasant diversion.

London, Here We Come

We received confirmation this morning that our London flat has been successfully booked.  It took a lot of searching but we finally found something within our budget.  The flat comes with WiFi, is fully furnished and situated near Willesden Green tube station.  It's a mezzanine double studio and the only bills outside of rent are electricity, via top-up (same set-up we have now), and TV license (optional).

We still need to purchase our train tickets to London and we haven't yet made arrangements for accommodations upon our return to Dundee in September but we have time to sort those details out.  The biggest stress, and the deal breaker, was the London accommodations piece and we're absolutely thrilled to have that detail sorted.

Unemployment Ponderings

In 2007, I took a one month sabbatical between jobs.  I celebrated that sabbatical as though it was a well-deserved break; dining out with friends, drinking all day long, mid-day movies.  My current state of unemployment, however, does not feel like a well-deserved break.  On the contrary, it has me seriously re-thinking my short-term plans.

Dundee has a dearth of employment opportunities and my original plan, to rely on temp agencies for employment between holidays, is not working out.  Temp agencies are just not performing the same role here as they did in Seattle which means I'm going to have to figure something else out if this adventure is going to succeed.

One More Week

One week from today we leave for Paris.  The flight is just under two hours long but we have an hour and 15 minute train ride from Dundee to Edinburgh beforehand.  Regardless, total travel time is still minimal.  We can't believe we live so close to Paris.

Snow Behaviours

We had a pretty amazing snowstorm Sunday evening, including thunder and lightning which roused us from sleep a few times throughout the night.  The amazing thunder crashes and flashes of light which lit up the sky made us hopeful for future snowstorms during an otherwise dreary season.  Disappointingly, the next morning we learned that thunder snowstorms are rare and should not be expected in the future.  Too bad because it was quite a show.

Although the thunder and lightning only lasted that first night the snow has continued on and off over the last two days and Dundee has seemingly shut down.  One would think snow would be common in all of Scotland but apparently it's as rare in Dundee as it was in Seattle.  Just a few inches on the ground have caused school closures, including Mike's university, businesses closing early if they were able to open at all and, something we thought isolated to Seattle, the abandoning of cars on the roadside.

Abandoning one's car has always seemed a bit drastic to us.  Perhaps on a side street when near home but, both here and in Seattle, abandoning one's car on the motorway, where no easier walking route is apparent, seems to be common.  After 11 years in Seattle and now our first winter in Dundee, this behaviour still proves perplexing to a couple from Salt Lake City, Utah where snow is used more for recreation than as an excuse to park one's car on the freeway.